Evelyn’s Birth Story

Evelyn Sedona Gayhart's Arrival

Please know that there are birth images in this article, incase that makes you uncomfortable.

It was June first. I was sitting at my computer when I felt the tell tale pop. "Was that what I thought it was?" I sat still for another couple of minutes trying to determine if yes, in fact, my water had broken. 

After not much had changed, I got up, walked to the bathroom, and as soon as I got in there, fluid started pouring down my legs. Yep, my water had definitely just broken. 

I changed real quick and immediately called Shaun. And then my midwife. And then my mom. And then my grandma. Evelyn was on her way! 

I tried to stay as calm as I could, but my mind was so excited and nervous at the same time that I could barely focus. I knew there was still so much we had to prepare - the bed needed to be covered with plastic and the second set of linens put on, the birth pool and hose needed setting up, the house needed to be tidied before the midwives arrived, and most importantly, the cactus soap needed to be put out in the bathroom, to go along with the birthing theme for “Evelyn Sedona”... because, naturally, the midwives would definitely want to see soap in line with our theme when they came over to help deliver our baby. 

Meanwhile, Shaun’s calling every couple of minutes because he was about 45 minutes away and didn’t want to miss the birth of our baby. 

Once he got home, we ran through the list and yes, made sure the bathroom had cactus soap. It’s all about the details. 

By that time, one of our midwives was on her way over to check my vitals, make sure my water had truly broken, and to make sure everything looked healthy and on track. My contractions were quite small and manageable at that point, but definitely consistent, which they hadn’t been before. 

Around 11 pm, our midwife said everything looked fine, so she was going to run home, get some sleep for a half an hour, and then head back our way along with the other two midwives. At that point I was about 2cm dilated so Evelyn would definitely be making her arrival soon. 

Shortly after she left, my contractions quickened pace and intensity. I could no longer talk through them and they required a lot of my focus. I did my best to work through them and we began keeping a timer. 

All three midwives arrived back at the house around 2am, bringing in all of their supplies and getting the house set up as they needed. Each room in our house was dimly lit and that set the perfect ambience for the labor to come. They each did their own thing and largely let me work through the waves of labor on my own, unless they saw me struggling and would offer a few words of advice or pieces of encouragement. They were so wonderful. 

As we got deeper in to the morning hours, one midwife suggested I squat and sway with each oncoming contraction, to help bring Evelyn further down in to the birth canal. We got close to my bed and dresser and she encouraged me to use the furniture to lean against in order to stabilize myself. I tried doing this a couple of times, but it intensified the contractions so much so that the intensity caused me to vomit. Twice.

I decided after that to move back to sitting down on the couch, as that seemed to be the only place I could purely focus on getting through each contraction and stay somewhat comfortable.

The hours went on and as we finally made it in to the morning, my pain was becoming unbearable. I finally asked one of the midwives if there was anything we could do for pain as I wasn’t going to be able to bear it much longer. It was at that point they decided to start filling the birth pool, as usually the moments when a birthing mother feels like she is going to give up, is right before the baby is about to come. 

I felt much ease knowing I would be able to get in to the birth pool soon, but it seemed to be taking forever. Shaun told me the water pressure was really weak and therefore the pool wasn’t filling as fast as we had hoped. When it was about 3/4 of the way full, I could feel Evelyn ready to come and told everyone I needed to get in NOW. 

The midwives suggested I go to the bathroom to empty myself and then come back and get in the pool. Thank God Shaun was there, because I was so exhausted from laboring that I could barely walk, and he helped me climb in to the birth tub. 

I’ll never forget that I was first sitting on my back in the birth tub, but every time a contraction rolled in, in took over me in such a way that I had no strength to control my body and my body would slide deeper in to the tub almost taking me under. Shaun was helpful in holding me up, but it was so much unnecessary effort that one of the midwives finally suggested I roll over on to my hands and knees so I could stay upright more easily. Shaun and the midwife rolled me over and I was able to put my arms over the tub wall for extra support. 

By that time, the contractions were so intense that every time one came, I found myself letting out the deepest, primal moan and was sure all of the neighbors down the street could hear it. I needed something to squeeze but was afraid of hurting Shaun, so I grabbed his collar instead. If you know Shaun, you know that he hates wearing shirts with stretched collars; they always have to be tidy and tight. So at one point, he said to me, “Love, your stretching my collar,” and all I remember saying back to him was, “Well, you’re going to have to let that go right now.” And then another contraction came on and there I was, pulling his collar again. 

What I assume was around 7:05am, Evelyn started crowning. Many of you have probably heard of the “ring of fire” feeling that comes along with the widest part of the baby’s head crowning.. Well, when I finally got to that point, my midwife told me to get Evelyn’s head to the edge of that, hold it there to allow my body to stretch, and then ease off. I would do that a couple of times and then push her out. But as soon as I felt that ring of fire for the first time, I knew there was no way I wanted to stay there or experience it again, even if that meant I would possibly tear. So in the moment of the next contraction, I pushed along with my body and felt Evelyn come twisting out of me and in to the birthing pool. It was such relief after nine months of being pregnant and ten hours of laboring. Best feeling in the world. 

I was so excited to see Evelyn but in that moment was so physically exhausted that all I could think was that she was safe with the midwife and that I just needed a second to breathe and come back in to this realm. Everyone kept repeating, “Ashley, here’s your baby. Look, turn and see your baby.” But my body was so limp that I was having a hard time rolling over again. Shaun helped me and they put Evelyn in my arms. It was such a surreal feeling - one of full surrender and strength. 

I sat there looking at her little body covered completely in vernix thinking, “I did it. She’s here. I am so powerful. Wow, my body actually did it.” And then I just stared at her with Shaun for the next couple of minutes, catching my breath. 

Shortly after, the midwives and Shaun helped me to stand and walk in to our bedroom, so the three of us could lay down and get some skin to skin time with Evelyn. The midwives cleaned her up quickly and swaddled her, and then passed her back to Shaun and I where we just cuddled with her all morning. Without rush, the midwives would take her every so often so they could record vitals, birth weight and height, and do their overall wellness check.

Shortly after birthing and once we were in the bedroom, the midwives talked me through delivering my placenta. That wasn’t a painful experience as much as it was uncomfortable, like having period cramps. Once I worked through that, we delayed the cord clamping, but then when the time came, Shaun finally got to cut the cord. We decided to freeze the placenta and will later plant it here at home in the garden. 

When the midwives finished their evaluations, they left midday to let Shaun, Evelyn and I relax and be together for the first time as a family. It was such a lovely afternoon. 

Our home birth experience was so incredible and so empowering. I am truly grateful we were able to bring Evelyn in to the world in the comfort of our own home. It just felt so right ✨